Aah, The Holidays! What a splendid time of the year. Bah! And, I don’t need to live in a Christmas Carol to add—Humbug! The Grinch’s heart didn’t grow three sizes that day. It was merely an illusion. He didn’t attend the feasting of the beasts. Instead, he started exercising by …
Do you remember the meme when fall first arrived? You know…that meme? There were quite a few, but all had the same message. The pics or gifs or pdfs or whatever we call them nowadays, shows a picture of an oak or maple with half of the tree still holding …
Do I have something in my teeth? Is my deodorant failing? Seriously, I am having trouble making and keeping friends in this new town and it doesn’t make a lick of sense. I mean, I’m awesome, humble, have a charismatic personality, and am darn good looking. I don’t understand why …
Ahhh, there’s nothing like the feeling of knowing Fall is official and a harvest moon rises from the horizon to set the tone for the upcoming month’s colored leaves, crisp air, and pumpkin spice. This is the time of year to metaphysically reflect on the seeds we’ve sown and dance …
Everyone has that one friend. You know the one I’m talking about. That friend that’s so weird, he makes you feel sane. Well, we need to talk about my friend. We had flown three thousand miles across the country for a not-so-fun visit. But rather than discussing the sadness that …
Ahh, the sacred GARAGE. The most versatile place of any home. Is it a car port? A storage unit? The rock band’s rehearsal room? That’s the best part. You choose. Basically, garages are utilized differently to different folks. When I lived on the West Coast, there was some kind of …
Bob was The Shit! It turns out that everyone in this small-town knew Bob. He was a retired lawyer who built the house I’m living in now. And according to many of the neighbors in this subdivision, he was a fanatic about keeping the yard tidy, the rock beds de-weeded, …
Several months ago, all my computer files hooked up with Jack and they followed him up the gnarly bean stalk in the cloudy sky, never to return again. When that happened, I took it as a sign from a greater power that forced me to come face to face with …
When I lost all my stories a few weeks ago, I only had one conclusion after all the tears and snot got blown into a tissue—the Universe was making me look at life from a different perspective. Those stories are like stuff. You can’t take it with you when you …
Painters need paint. Politicians need crowds. A swordsman needs a sword. Blacksmiths need fire. A writer needs a pencil. After my return from vacation, I was going to give you insight into my ridiculous California friends and how I feel like I’m in a movie whenever we’re together. It was …
